Coldplay Sucks

Does no one else see that Coldplay fucking sucks? Honestly, am I the only person who sees this? Am I the only person who heard “Clocks” the first time it was played on the radio and said, “oh wow, new U2…sounds pretty good.” How could you not listen to Coldplay and think they sound exactly like a U2 cover band? And Jesus, a bad one at that. Chris Robinson is on my list of people who deserve a serious beating (this is an actual list; or at least it will be, I write pretty fast. I’m also going to start compiling a list of people who deserve to step on a rusty nail; he could probably go on that one too). I just don’t understand it. I don’t see how any self-respecting fan of U2 could also be a fan of Coldplay. It’s like telling people you like Adam Sandler and Jimmy Fallon…oh really? What the fuck’s the difference? One guy came first, the second guy came along and tried to capitalize on pretty much the same exact thing. Why couldn’t Fallon stop laughing at his own jokes and playing the guitar, it was only half-funny when Sandler did it. I can’t even put it into words, I am completely and utterly unable to express how much they suck. In the words of Homer Simpson, Coldplay is the, “suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked!”